I'm back!

I'm back!

I post on Facebook when anything big comes up, or even small things, so I have gotten way from blogging. Work has strict guidelines for computer use, and when I am home there are often other things taking my time and attention.  But I got an email from a dear friend who pointed me to another blogger and I found myself captivated again. I spent a week reading her blog from oldest to newest and was reminded of why I loved my blog and I missed it.

So a brief synopsis of things since over a year ago:

I still work in child protection. There are thinks I like and appreciate about it, and others that have hurt my heart. I still want to do counseling/therapy, and still feel drawn to it, but I am not seeing signs that it is time to move on yet.

Eric still works for the federal government.  He's had a promotion, and more responsibility. It's a job, it pays the bills, and he works hard. He takes good care of me and we are happy.

We are down to two kids at home, for however long. Aurora graduated college, and Reimond decided it wasn't for him. Both are living at home for the nonce. Patrick is living in town, and Brie and her girls are in Missouri, about 90 minutes away, with her husband.  I have the girls for two weeks while Brie is at guard annual training. I took two weeks off to do it and we are managing just fine. Skye will be 6 in August, and Adrianna is 5 months. 

 

Tony's kids are growing too: Justin is 11 and Alexis is 9.  He just bought a boat and it looks like such fun! He and Andrea are going strong. Liisa got divorced the end of last year. She has a new guy in her life who makes her happy. I am so proud of the adults my children have become. They are wonderful people.

I am still very actively doing my handwork.  I just finished knitting a summer sweater for me, and a sweater for Skye. Still need to make Adrianna's matching one. I also finished an entralac scarf. Now my knitting focus is a pair of socks for Eric. I have a couple of quilts being stitched, and two to quilt. I have cross stitch projects and crochet projects too. I also am still spinning on the drop spindle. Have not gotten a spinning wheel yet, but still hoping for one.

 

I need to focus more on my diet and exercise. I saw the cardiologist who said I need to lose weight and become fitter. I'm trying. The girls are keeping me moving that's for sure.  Small steps are what I need to do...

Anyway, it's a start!

January recap

In the spirit of trying to get back in the swing of things, here are some pictures from a little "minication" Eric and I took two weeks ago. I had a Friday thru Monday off, and he was on vacation Friday thru the following Saturday, so we went to Frankfort KY for a few days, leaving Friday after my doctors appointments were done (the reason I took Friday off) and drove back Sunday afternoon.  Our "excuse" for visiting Frankfort was a shop called the Woolery, which sells weaving looms, spinning wheels, fiber, spindles, and rughooking supplies. The key here is the number and variety of products sold. I am interested in getting a spinning wheel and this was a way to see and try a variety of them, including the brand I was considering.

This is the wheel I have my heart set on. Hopefully it will be mine sometime this year.

The Kentucky River and an old bridge. We walked the river trail, had a snack at a college coffee shop, spent a good hour or more in the shop, where we met other fools who drove from out of state just to shop there (we met couples from Florida, Ohio, and Tennessee there, along with us who traveled 5 hours to get there); we went to a local winery, had dinner at a local restaurant, and enjoyed two nights in a very nice best western. On the way home we explored the shorter tour of the Marengo Caves in southern Indiana. That was awesome!

And I did buy a new lace drop spindle because it was pretty, and some fiber to spin up because I liked the colors.

We came home and I immediately worked the next 11 days straight, sometimes 9-10 hour days, and I got slammed with cases (5 cases per day the last 2 Friday's when a normal day is 1-3 cases max per day...) I began a writing day on Tuesday with 40 open cases and was able to close 16 of them by the end of Wednesday (most were close to being closed, just no time to finish the paperwork until this week), but then added back in 9 new ones, getting 3 emergencies on Friday plus two 24 hour ones... Needless to say I am exhausted. I spent yesterday reading for a bit and relaxing, and playing everquest with Eric now that the desktop is working and we can enjoy playing together again. Today I plan to do as little as necessary too, because Monday it begins all over again.

I find my job challenging and sometimes stressful, lately even overwhelming because of the sheer volume of the cases coming in. We have some new people who will enter the rotation soon, as they finish up training, but have been running short staffed for what sounds like forever. Some positives of my job are seeing newborns and sweet little ones, going into old houses and imagining what some of them were like in their heydays, and being in and out of the office. Most cases aren't terribly "serious" although all need to be addressed, and for that I am grateful too. It's just how they seem never ending sometimes. There are times I think there but for the grace of God it could have been (or was) me once upon a time, and there are people who leave me humbled by their strength and their faith. I was touched by one woman who said to her adult child "you can talk to her, she's one of the good ones who really care." I think every one I work with really care, but sometimes there isn't much we can do. I do a lot of praying.

Aurora is back from Costa Rica and had the trip of a lifetime. Brie is struggling with a loss of hours and lack of security in her job situation. Patrick is in the process of moving out and into an apartment. Reimond is looking at a possible promotion of sorts at work, and his girlfriend has been accepted to Penn State,her dream school, next fall. Classes are resumed/resuming for the college kids for spring semester, Eric is back on overnights, and life is trying to find what passes for the new normal.

I still have not mailed out Christmas gifts, despite their being done. Not home when the post office is open... So kids will get gifts in February I guess. I am hoping Eric can mail them Monday before he heads to bed.

That's the update! Now time to get another cup of coffee and the next item on the list.

Thanks for the nudge, and a Happy New Year!

Thanks for the nudge, and happy new year!

First, some recent photos for color:

Skye at preschool last week.

A cross stitch tragedy: after almost 8 years of inconsistent effort, I found a small (I believe) coffee stain that had been covered over by the drape to hide it... I tried spot cleaning and it wicked out into a horrid puddle of brown that I couldn't live with. So I soaked it in cold water and orvus and prayed, rinsing it in clean cold water and soaking more... The color ran on the silks and stained other silks, and the background fabric also bleached, and I am so sad. Other stitches have said its cool, to keep going and to see if I can duplicate the bleed on the other side, but I can't. My only decision now is whether I want to try and save the beads or not, because there are so many in it already. Not a single sitting project by any means. I have ordered new fabric to start it again, and if I need to I may scavenge from it, but I may have enough on hand still.

This is my new to me car, a 2012 Nissan Versa. It handles well and gets great gas mileage, so I am pleased. Given my work schedule of late I have primarily driven back and forth, but with gas prices falling it's almost cheaper than train fare, and faster a commute too.

I finished my Christmas sewing late, and need to mail things out this weekend, but I have been on non-self-imposed bed rest the past four days. I got hit with a horrid case of viral gastroenteritis, and have been soooo sick! I literally have been in bed other than a trip to the clinic on Tuesday, where I was given a shot in the butt of phenergan, a prescription of that too, and was told I needed to take things easy. I was sent home, told to drink plenty, and take it slow. The virus screwed with my pulse and blood pressure and they were out of whack, which explains some of the shortness of breath etc I have been dealing with lately. I plan to go to work tomorrow to deal with anything pressing, and do have a doctors note. Then while I am babysitting this weekend, at least I will have a couple more days. I am feeling better, but not yet me.

Aurora is safely in Costa Rica, on her biology class trip, and I am hoping she is enjoying the rain forest. Patrick, Reimond, and Brie have been working. Eric is picking up overtime as it comes available, and I have worked weekends and holidays over recent weeks that helped to burn me out. 

My job is going ok. I am a perfectionist and my job is one that doesn't ever go as you expect. I like it, am challenged by it, and occasionally frustrated by it. But there is still so much to learn and I try so hard to do it right. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by it all. The big thing I have realized is I need to find some balance, between work and taking care of me. Meals are a challenge because even though I am in charge of my office versus field work, I hate eating on the run, but I also hate taking away from the time I have for visits when it seems like a never ending battle to find/meet with the families we are concerned about. On Friday I had my first door slammed in my face, but I have heard it won't be the last time it happens. My current case load is fairly manageable, but missing 4 days of work has my already knotted stomach anxious about what I may have left undone that needed handling. My performance is measured in outcomes, including how quickly I make first contact, when I get signed off by my supervisor, and other deadlines that are mandated both by the state and federal governments.  My numbers are not great right now, no matter how hard I try, and it is a combination of circumstances, types of cases, etc. those factors do get included, but none the less I worry about my performance. I am trying so hard!

I am not knitting much lately, although I did start a cross stitch sampler for the new year, and I have been reading quite a bit. Most of my tv watching has gone by the wayside, and I only play everquest on the weekends, hit or miss fashion. I have realized that there are things that can function without my direct supervision, but there are times it feels like everyone has their own agenda and expectations of me and I am not living up to what everyone wants right now. Felling a bit stressed as I try to find my way. 

Anyhow, I am not making any major New Years resolutions, just continuing to try and move forward on being the best person I can be, with Gods grace and direction. I am slowly losing weight (not holding my breath that the 4 lbs I lost being sick will last), I am walking about 15 miles per week, and I hope to begin doing the yoga again. I also hope to focus on projects around the house. That's it. Nothing too major. 

Hope everyone has a blessed new year!

It's been two weeks, time for an update...

Things are going fine here. I have started getting my own cases, and I am finding the work challenging in a good way, and rewarding, however I am also getting fairly simple cases to break me in easily. I have a good supervisor whose goal is to not burn me out; from what another worker has said, not all supervisors are as respectful. 

Skye had a tummy bug earlier this week: she woke up at midnight Wednesday morning throwing up, and we had 3 baths and three complete changes of bedding in 5 hours... Poor kid took a couple of days to fully bounce back, and I called off Wednesday so I could take care of her. She is doing better now, thank goodness because it's hard, even knowing at times she is a drama queen who milks it for all it's worth at times.

We have been practicing her writing, both on paper and using an app I downloaded on my iPad. She is really enjoying creating letters, and she has even figured out (the minx) how to save some of her creations to my photo gallery...

This is an example of what I find unexpectedly :)

Aurora has started bowling again with the college team and practices are taking up much of the free time that studying isn't using; Reimond got a job at Texas Roadhouse as a busboy and is, so far, finding it surprisingly enjoyable. The paycheck won't hurt either. He is making significantly less than minimum wage, but he also gets a percentage of the tips. We'll see how that turns out when he sees his first pay check. School is going fine for both of them. Patrick too is working more hours, and he is keeping vampiric hours: goes to bed with the sunrise generally and gets up early afternoon. 

I was enjoying some pics Zack posted of an outing he and his kids took to Taylor's falls today: I love that state park and it looks like they had a ball!

The weather down here has been gorgeous this week and the foliage is starting to show some color. And I really enjoy Kiener Plaza kitty-corner to my office building because of the fountains, "waterfalls" and reflecting pool, and green spaces to go sit by during my lunches. I really have missed all my out-of-doors time this summer, especially since most of my weekends off previously have either been stormy or ungodly hot and humid!

Eric had a weeks vacation a week ago and spent some of it working in the yard, in between walks with the dog and keeping Skye occupied. He is headed back onto overnights soon, and life will get confusing while we get reorganized to that routine.

That is all that's new around here!

Some photos from the past weekend

I made an impulsive trip home to MN for Labor Day weekend and spent some quality time with my mom, my kids, and my grandkids. I didn't really give many people a heads up that I was in town, because I had not been home in over 15 months and I really didn't have time to run the roads--I was parked between mom's, Liisa's and Tony's houses, and Jeffrey loaned me his jeep to get between houses. I had a wonderful time, and it was clearly too short a trip to do all that I would have liked, but I got in some nice chats with mom and quality cuddles with the grandkids.

 

  

My room at the Radisson Blu Friday night, courtesy of Liisa and the hotel staff!

Playing in the pool with Justin and Alexis on Saturday morning!

Loving with the grandkids at Liisa and Zacks's...

Family at mom's.

Fire in the storm at Tony and Andrea's...

And a flight home on Monday, so I could go back to work Tuesday! 

Work is going well and I am starting to get my own cases. The family is doing fine, and Skye had a wonderful birthday. She is quite happy being 4 now.  And now it is Sunday again, and I need to finish up some chores, so this is picture heavy and light on verbiage :)

I apologize for my hiatus!

Life has been busy around here! Brie and Skye have moved back home, Brie just finished out her two week notice at the bank, commuting each way for the last week and a half, and I am in the final weeks of intensive training for my job. The photo is of a quick cuddle before I headed off to work, which Skye isn't sure she likes very much (she liked me home with her), although her time with papa, aunt Aurora, uncle Rei, and occasionally Patrick has been "okay". Brie is looking to enroll her in a local preschool/daycare so we have coverage when she is at her month long guard training in September, and then the focus will be on transportation for me, because I am turning in the rental at the end of my training days.

Rei made the deans list for his spring semester, and has a 3.5 gpa for his first year of college, and he got another A for his painting class this summer. I was very amused by a story he shared last night: when babysitting Skye this week, he, some friends, and Skye were drawing with calk on the sidewalk. His friend was so proud of a drawing he did of a dragon for Skye, until he looked at the human face Rei had drawn nearby... He said " dang it Rei! I was feeling really good about my drawing, but there you are making art!" It was a really nice, detailed face (unfortunately it rained before I could get out there to take a picture). Aurora has worked really hard this summer and has been putting money away for a trip with school, and Patrick has been working too.

The month of June, besides being filled with my new job, was a month for family. Alex came to visit, along with his parents, and it was wonderful spending time with them. Photos were taken and stories were shared. It was a healing, loving visit, and we are so blessed having them in our lives.

Training has been very challenging for me, and I have been told I am doing very well in it, that I have the  necessary skills, experience, and personality for it, and I am finding it to be interesting, eye-opening, and satisfying. I have seen my first heroin addicted newborns, dealt with a shaken baby case, and seen a number of neglect cases. I have sat in on forensic interviews for child sexual abuse, and have been to court a number of times, all parts of my shadowing experiences. I like the fast pace of it, and while I have been a bit bored during office time when nothing is going on, I know that will change when I get my own case load come September.

I am sure many of you have heard of Michael Brown and Ferguson MO... That is a suburb of St. Louis, and is considered county rather than city, but it is just across I-70 from St. Louis, and I have co-workers who live and work in that community (one of our county offices is up there). Obviously feelings and tensions are running high, especially in the populations we serve, and it's effects are being felt all over St. Louis. Safety is a primary concern for all of us, and while opinions vary regarding the facts of the case, the media spin, and outside interventions (e.g. Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, even the president's comments), all hope this will be sorted out and things will calm soon. To me, and in my opinion only, good kids can make stupid choices which end in tragic consequences, cops are human too, and when provoked may overreact as well, and the truth of the matter lies somewhere in the middle of all of these points of view and opinions.  Thankfully trial by public opinion is NOT the law of the land.

The bottom line is that in getting used to my new schedule (my alarm goes off at 5:15 and I am generally on the road between 6:30 and 7, depending on my destination), dealing with traffic headaches and construction, and then long days of training in state and local policies, I get home at the end of the day and am wiped out! I have been going to bed between 8:30 and 9:30 each night (of late with Skye, who may or may not cooperate), and I am out! The state of MO is very particular about Internet use at work due to the privacy laws, so I have limited access to things like my blog, personal emails, and the like during work hours, and although I check them and Facebook during my off time, sometimes I am too tired to do more than just read them. I have tried to do some handwork too, but it feels like everything is taking a back seat to my work life for right now while I get used to the new routine. I will try to be more faithful to the blog and updates, because I know people worry if I let it go too long. I do appreciate the emails though! 

Love you all!

Early May

Saturday was prom for Mascoutah. Reimond had never gone to his, because of miscellaneous reasons, but he did go this year, with his girlfriend Jamie. They had a really nice time. I wasn't able to see them, except in photos, because they got ready at Jamie's house, and I had no car to get back and forth, but I have enjoyed hearing all the stories, and seeing the pictures.

Today is one of those perfect days. I have been up since 7, working on changing around my sleep schedule some in the hope of having a job, and I am sitting in the backyard with my coffee and my iPad, enjoying the birdsong, insect buzzing, and the warm breeze. Eric is working today, his fifth day in a row (60 hours!), Patrick is still abed, and the others are at school. I love the peacefulness of it all. Later on I will focus on the chores needing to be done, but for now, I will enjoy my yard. 

I am assuming my interview went well, because they finished their interview schedule on Thursday and were calling on my references on Friday. I know that is no guarantee, but it is hopeful. Part of me thinks it will be fun working out of downtown St. Louis, and regardless of which position I get hired for, there will be lots of moving around and being out of office time as well as office work, so it should be interesting and challenging. 

I am also feeling more "myself" if that makes sense. The winter depression has lifted, and getting my hair done (highlighted/shaped) has "removed a few years" to quote my son. I had bangs cut again, and when I look I the mirror I like what I see. My weight, of course hasn't cooperated, and my increased sedentariness since Skye moved away has contributed, but I am not letting it bother me over much, and I am. Trying to just be mindful about my calories and my activities.

I did have Skye here this weekend, and it was a lot of fun. She introduced herself to Jamie's grandma as "Skye, the Princess" and we spent part of our weekend playing in the castle (my yard swing), as various Disney princesses in let's pretend games, riding her bike ( she has finally mastered both pedaling and steering at the same time), and cuddling while reading stories, singing, and watching Disney junior on tv. 

 Skye is never still,  and she has an endless appetite for everything--food, knowledge, attention... She makes me so happy. We looked and the photos I have of when she was a tiny newborn, and she just giggled at how small she was, and what a big girl she is now. I have no pictures from this visit where she isn't in motion, and she only napped on Saturday (having gotten up at 5:30 am) because she sat down to watch a movie. 

Reimond had two pictures in his first college art show in April, and they are on display thru mid May. He is doing really well this second semester, and I am proud of him. Aurora too is working really hard at school, and is focused on homework almost to the exclusion of all else! That isn't to say she doesn't have a social life--she does, she just is a really diligent student! Since Patrick and Kalen broke up, Patrick is out and about when he isn't working, and we hardly see him. He's almost a ghost, who comes and goes at will!

Brie, James, and the kids are doing fine; Liisa loves her new position, as assistant director of guest services at the Radisson Blu, and Zack has returned to Dickie's, as a general manager for their Shakopee store. Tony and Andrea are also content, and the kids are busy with school and activities. I am so grateful to social networking to stay an active part of their lives!

That is all that's new around here. I suppose it's time to head in as my coffee cup is empty!