Thursday, January 8, 2015

Thanks for the nudge, and a Happy New Year!

Thanks for the nudge, and happy new year!

First, some recent photos for color:

Skye at preschool last week.

A cross stitch tragedy: after almost 8 years of inconsistent effort, I found a small (I believe) coffee stain that had been covered over by the drape to hide it... I tried spot cleaning and it wicked out into a horrid puddle of brown that I couldn't live with. So I soaked it in cold water and orvus and prayed, rinsing it in clean cold water and soaking more... The color ran on the silks and stained other silks, and the background fabric also bleached, and I am so sad. Other stitches have said its cool, to keep going and to see if I can duplicate the bleed on the other side, but I can't. My only decision now is whether I want to try and save the beads or not, because there are so many in it already. Not a single sitting project by any means. I have ordered new fabric to start it again, and if I need to I may scavenge from it, but I may have enough on hand still.

This is my new to me car, a 2012 Nissan Versa. It handles well and gets great gas mileage, so I am pleased. Given my work schedule of late I have primarily driven back and forth, but with gas prices falling it's almost cheaper than train fare, and faster a commute too.

I finished my Christmas sewing late, and need to mail things out this weekend, but I have been on non-self-imposed bed rest the past four days. I got hit with a horrid case of viral gastroenteritis, and have been soooo sick! I literally have been in bed other than a trip to the clinic on Tuesday, where I was given a shot in the butt of phenergan, a prescription of that too, and was told I needed to take things easy. I was sent home, told to drink plenty, and take it slow. The virus screwed with my pulse and blood pressure and they were out of whack, which explains some of the shortness of breath etc I have been dealing with lately. I plan to go to work tomorrow to deal with anything pressing, and do have a doctors note. Then while I am babysitting this weekend, at least I will have a couple more days. I am feeling better, but not yet me.

Aurora is safely in Costa Rica, on her biology class trip, and I am hoping she is enjoying the rain forest. Patrick, Reimond, and Brie have been working. Eric is picking up overtime as it comes available, and I have worked weekends and holidays over recent weeks that helped to burn me out. 

My job is going ok. I am a perfectionist and my job is one that doesn't ever go as you expect. I like it, am challenged by it, and occasionally frustrated by it. But there is still so much to learn and I try so hard to do it right. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by it all. The big thing I have realized is I need to find some balance, between work and taking care of me. Meals are a challenge because even though I am in charge of my office versus field work, I hate eating on the run, but I also hate taking away from the time I have for visits when it seems like a never ending battle to find/meet with the families we are concerned about. On Friday I had my first door slammed in my face, but I have heard it won't be the last time it happens. My current case load is fairly manageable, but missing 4 days of work has my already knotted stomach anxious about what I may have left undone that needed handling. My performance is measured in outcomes, including how quickly I make first contact, when I get signed off by my supervisor, and other deadlines that are mandated both by the state and federal governments.  My numbers are not great right now, no matter how hard I try, and it is a combination of circumstances, types of cases, etc. those factors do get included, but none the less I worry about my performance. I am trying so hard!

I am not knitting much lately, although I did start a cross stitch sampler for the new year, and I have been reading quite a bit. Most of my tv watching has gone by the wayside, and I only play everquest on the weekends, hit or miss fashion. I have realized that there are things that can function without my direct supervision, but there are times it feels like everyone has their own agenda and expectations of me and I am not living up to what everyone wants right now. Felling a bit stressed as I try to find my way. 

Anyhow, I am not making any major New Years resolutions, just continuing to try and move forward on being the best person I can be, with Gods grace and direction. I am slowly losing weight (not holding my breath that the 4 lbs I lost being sick will last), I am walking about 15 miles per week, and I hope to begin doing the yoga again. I also hope to focus on projects around the house. That's it. Nothing too major. 

Hope everyone has a blessed new year!