25 things about me...

This is floating around Facebook and I was on the receiving end of a "tag." I worked pretty hard to write it out and posted it there; I thought I would also post it here as not everyone is on facebook...

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

1. I am not a terribly spontaneous person. The craziest and most spontaneous thing I have ever done in my life was to meet someone online playing an MORPG, fall in love with him, quit my job of 16+ years, marry him, and move 600 miles from everything and everyone I have known and loved, all in a year's time. I have never been happier or more content!

2. I love talking to people. Everyone I meet has a story to tell and I want to hear them all! This is despite the fact that I tend to be very reserved and am uncomfortable in most social settings unless I am with people I know well. I prefer to meet people one on one rather than "work a crowd" and will often sit quietly as an observer rather than try to be the center of attention or introduce myself randomly to others.

3. I am a woman of strong faith and rely on God's grace to see me through any and all situations life throws at me. He has never failed me, and I can provide real life examples of His actions in my life (like me walking into a store to buy thread and walking out with a part time job today). I trust implicitly in God's timing being perfect, despite my own impatience for things to happen as I'd like them to, on my timetable, and I know that He will always provide what I need.

4. I am a product of my upbringing. I am a "preacher's kid" in the classic sense of the label and I do believe that there is an appropriate time and a place for certain modes of dress or behaviors rather than this "I'll do as I please" approach many people have today. I also believe in respect, dignity, and that no one is beyond the gift of redemption. Everyone deserves another chance or an opportunity to change.

5. I believe all children deserve unconditional love and acceptance, as well as structure, instruction, and accountability for their actions. It is the bedrock of my parenting style, and I have been blessed with many children (both of my body, and of my heart) who call me "Mom" with love and respect. I love being both a parent and a parental figure to others.

6. I believe that the past provides the foundation of who we are as people, but doesn't define or limit who we become. The past is a stepping stone from which we move forward, and it is up to us to decide what direction we want to go. We were given free will for a reason.

7. I was brought up with an old-school work ethic: you do your job to the best of your ability, you take pride in what you do, and you give an honest day's work for an honest day's wage. I am dumbfounded by the work ethics of some of the "young people" (teens/twenty-somethings) I have met or worked with who think they should get top dollar for doing as little as possible, who think nothing of calling off work "just because they don't feel like going in," and, who feel it isn't in their job description to be considerate of others they work with. It frustrates me to no end, because I have often been the one covering for them/cleaning up after them because the job needs to be done.

8. My first marriage was the marriage that made me into a grownup. When it ended in divorce I was devastated, but it forced me to re-evaluate who I was as a person, and what I wanted for myself out of life. I became someone I really like as a person and have discovered strengths about myself I never knew I had. In this new marriage I have found the person I want to grow old with, and I feel more complete now than I ever did in the past.

9. I don't really like soda or ice cream, but sometimes I get a craving for it and have to go out and get some! On the other hand, I love both dark chocolate, and sweet wines in moderation.

10. I am a talented needlewoman and can do just about anything I set my mind to with a needle and thread. One of my dreams is to have a studio that houses all of my passions and supplies in one place, along with fantastic lighting, lots of windows, and comfortable seating, where I can create to my heart's content, as well as share my passion by teaching others. One of my greatest pleasures in life was seeing the look of success in kid's faces as I taught them to knit or crochet, or stitch when I worked at the treatment center.

11. My needlework reflects my moods, and I have a project to fit every need: things requiring major concentration for times of escape, as well as things of mindless repetition to help pass time and offer prayers or meditation. That's why I keep so many works-in-process at any one time, and they do all eventually get finished.

12. My children and grandchildren are my pride and joy, and my reason for being. In them I see reflected the family members I have loved and lost, and they contain the best (and at time the worst) traits of both sides of their families. I love them unconditionally even during the times I might not like them very much...(LOL) and I am so proud of the people they have become!

13. I was bullied as a kid by other kids for being different. In elementary (and to a lesser degree middle and high) school I was beaten up, I was teased mercilessly, and I often dreaded going to school because of it. How was I different? Coming from a small town to the city, being a PK, and having parents who were the children of immigrants, I didn't dress as others did (I got my first pair of jeans at age 11), I was smart and studious (some might say a nerd), I was eager to please, and I wanted desperately to fit in. But I just didn't. Kids are not kind to those who are different. Eventually I found my niche, but to this day I prefer people who are real to those who follow the herd.

14. Unlike a lot of women, I have loved being in my 40's. It has been such a wonderful time of life for me, where I have done things I have wanted to do, felt confident in who I am as a person, and found satisfaction in how far I have come in life. As 50 approaches in a few years, I am not terribly afraid of it or of what the future holds for me. The ONLY thing that I find a bit freaky about it is my youngest son will turn 18 exactly a week before I turn 50; we will both hit major life milestones together.

15. My only regret about my new marriage is that my husband and I won't ever have a child together. Given our ages and where we are in life it wouldn't be practical even if it were possible (it's not). But that doesn't mean I don't think about it at random times and wonder what it would have been like had things been different.

16. I love playing video games and find great satisfaction in being a guild leader in an online role-playing game. I love the social aspect of it and the interactions we have along with the fantasy of being "alive" as someone completely different from my real life persona. It also adds some spice to my relationship with my husband, and being a gamer has opened many a door with depressed, introverted, troubled teens... When you speak a language they understand, communication begins!

17. I love to read. While my favorite genres are science fiction/fantasy and murder mysteries, I also love anything with suspense in it, things that provoke me to think, or things that move me out of my comfort zone.

18. I love to learn. I am an internship and a master's thesis away from my MS in Clinical Psych, and while my goal is to finish it in the next year, I am also considering getting an LMFT for practical purposes, and I still would love to get my PhD. A goal of mine is to do research and teach, as well as have a clinical practice. Maybe when I grow up... I have always wanted to be a "doctor", ever since I was a little girl.

19. I have been very blessed in my friends, some of whom I have been friends with for over 30 years. I don't have a lot of friends because I tend to be selective, but the ones I have I treasure and hold close, despite the miles that exist between us. Email and cell phones have been a blessing in helping to maintain communication, as has blogging and other forms of social networking, and I love it that real friendships come in many forms (i.e. role models, mentors, soul mates).

20. I have also been very blessed in my family. My mom says I am very like my dad, which I take as a huge compliment, and my mom and I are very close. I have 2 wonderful brothers and a sister I adore, and their families are as dear to me as my own is. Whenever we gather together there is laughter, love, and communion. We all feel a part of the whole that is bigger than each of us individually, and yet we all matter and when one is missing it is felt deeply. I am also a part of a larger extended family of in-laws all of whom I love and respect. I am blessed with an extensive "family of the heart".

21. I wish I were more athletic. I have always been a klutz--if there was a way to do it less-than-gracefully, that would be me. I once tripped over a grand piano, on stage, at a school concert! I envy people who feel comfortable in their bodies and enjoy sports/exercise/dance etc. I do my best, and I am not afraid to laugh at myself, but I just am not comfortable nor enjoy things that require gross motor coordination, muscle control, balance, or agility. I do, however, like watching some of it.

22. Working with severely emotionally and behaviorally disturbed teens has taught me more about life, determination, strength of character, and challenges than I would have ever learned in any other setting. The things that some of them had to endure would break your heart as well as your spirit, and yet for the ones who succeed, hope is an ever-present source of strength. I am humbled and honored to have been a part of so many young lives, and it is a source of pride to know that I have positively influenced and affected their lives as well. While I know we cannot save everyone, it is a comfort to know that I have at least helped to "plant seeds" and "shore up foundations" that deserved selvaging.

23. I believe that no education is ever wasted. It might not be used as intended, but the skills learned and the processes absorbed become a part of who you are as a person. I also believe that there are many forms of education, and formal education (e.g. college) is only one of many. A person can be highly educated but still not be wise, and someone with no formal education can still be a mentor and role model to others.

24. I believe everything happens for a reason, even if we cannot ever see clearly the big picture. I also believe that we influence what happens by the choices we make, even it if is only how we chose to respond to that which we have no control over. We are responsible for ourselves and need to be accountable for our decisions, good or bad.

25. I try really hard to live what I believe rather than just "preach it." My dad taught me well, and I hope I have made him proud.